A different kind of cultural clash

(NB! Not for sensitive people!)

Tim had to go to the office today, while I was at home working. On the way back, he walked through China town, where he was more or less attacked by a tiny Chinese woman.

She -You have wife or daughter?

Tim -Yes, I have a wife. (Thinking she was trying to marry off some distant relative or something.)

She -Then you have to buy latest thing in China. Very popular with women. All women drink it.

Tim -Ok? (Very uncertain.)

By then, the woman had started to get very pushy, and Tim decided that he better pick up on the offer, or there would be consequences from the Chinese Mafia. Also, parting with a pound seemed like the easiest way out of the situation.

So, Tim came home with three tubs (?) of the latest thing from China - vely populal with women... jelly juice! Yes, people, you read it right! I'm not sure whether it is juice in jelly, or jelly in juice, but it is suspicious and scary no matter which.

Obviously, I had to try it. Tim had bought 3 of them - orange, peach and mango. I decided to opt for the orange, as it seemed the least likely to be off-putting. How wrong I was! When "pouring" it into a glass, there were first a few drops of yellow liquid, and then a "long string" of jelly (later on it came in small pieces). Topping it up, it looked nothing less than a glass of slightly discoloured spunk! (Although getting it out of the container was more like squeezing zits - sorry, I warned you!)

I don't know about the rest of you - but jelly juice will definitely not be a hit in my books. But, if anyone is interested - there is still peach and mango here for you to try...

Stating the obvious

Sometimes I wonder about the labels producers put on their goods. I mean, come on!? New season?

Yes, well, I rather hope that I don't get last year's strawberries, but I also think it would be pretty obvious if I did!

Official

Yes, there's no more lying. I confess - I have become old! And here's the ultimate proof:

At the supermarket, I did not pick up a copy of Vouge or Elle, or even Cosmo - I bought the Sainsbury's Magazine - full of recipes and home decoration ideas. I feel absolutely ancient! (Although, admittedly, that is no surprise - I have always known there's a little old lady inside me...) OR, it's just because I'm looking forward to the first Christmas ever at our place, with family coming over - Swedish and English style double Christmas! The spirit is here already!

Swedish dinner

We were hanging out in a pub in Waterloo, after having paid a visit to the hospital again. Tim asked about the dinner. A Swedish one, tonight, as we had bought loads of meatballs. I was making an attempt to have Tim speak Swedish:

I: So, what are we having for dinner?

T: Köttbullar [meatballs].

I: And?
T: Potatis [potatoes].

I: And?

T: Gräddsås [creamy sauce].

I: And?

T: Eeeeh, wine?

I: No, I was thinking of a bärprodukt [berry product].

T: Eeeeh, stones?

Ha ha ha! I just had to laugh out load. Where did that come from? But I soon got my explaination, when I worked out that Tim thought I said bergprodukt [mountain product]. It was lingonberry jam I had in mind, but stones were definitely more innovative!

Shopping

Purchase of the week:

Banana ketchup!

Oh, this is just wrong on so many levels!
(And I am a little bit suspicious, since it says best before 2011... nasty bananans by then, surely!)

Doubtful...

The weirdest vegetables of the week (a.k.a. the strange stuff you get when you go to a overly posh restaurant, and this is all true):
1) Alexanders (just plain strange - but the Swedish name for it (Skotsk Libbsticka) makes it even funnier)
2) Tonka beans (as in Tilly Tonka? the chocolatier? It really sounds like something Roald Dahl would come up with. It's alternative name - Crabwood - is just as good!)
3) Hogweed (surely, that must be stright from Harry Potter?!)

Maybe Tim and I should become vegetarians again, just because of all the great names!

Stuffed

Have just come back home. The morning was spent singing with the choir, and afterward I met up with Tim. We went to lunch with a few of his colleagues. They have had an intern in their department, and he and his parents had invited us for lunch. The food was absolutely amazing (and so was their enormous central London house, filled with antiquities) but there was just so much of it. So, I have just had a five hour Persian lunch! I. Will. Never. Need. To. Eat. Again.

Easter, here I come

Went to Scandinavian Kitchen today, where they sell Scandinavian food and coffee (Gevalia!) as well as an assortment of especially imported Scandinavian groceries. So today I went bananas (considering the amounts of money we spent in IKEA the other day), and bought two bottles of rather overpriced Påskmust (a Swedish seasonal soda - it's a must, ha ha!) - £ 3,25/bottle! But it is only Easter once a year, and tomorrow we're having visitors - my cousin and her boyfriend from Milan, Italy.

Friday and Sunday I will sing with the choir, but the rest of the holidays I will just relax and eat loads of yummy food - we have bought an enormous lamb steak, as well as eggs and salmon and chocolate. Easter - I'm ready!

Shopping excursion

Today, I finally managed to get Tim to go with me to IKEA.* There are a few in and around London. Unfortunately, the one which is probably the closest to us (in Croydon) is not very easily accessible (as there are no tube lines going in the south, thanks to the swampy land). We have once before been to the store in Tottenham Hale, but decided to try the one in Wembley this time (both in north London). So, after a 30 minute tube ride we got off at Neasden. Well, the map wasn't exactly on our side, because there was quite a walk from the station and to the store (which was why we chose no to go to Tottenham Hale, where you have to take a shuttle bus). But we were there, so we might just as well go for it. We had the obligatory meatball lunch, and then strolled around. Got all the normal items - candles, serviettes, lightbulbs etc. My greatest buy was otherwise a great bit wok pan for the amazing price of £3! And then the food section! And this is normally the best thing about IKEA abroad - it's food heaven for an expat. We were both slightly disappointed this time though, because the food section was a lot smaller than in the other IKEA. Still, I managed to fill up a whole basket with Singoalla biscuites, dill flavoured crisps, elderberry lemonade, Swedish fish (from Malaco!), cheese (that can be sliced with a cheese slicer, yay!), Kopparberg's cider, lingoberry/cowberry jam (we got cloudberry jam last time) and other little bits and pieces. Tomorrow, I'm the one having polar bread and blueberry soup for breakfast!


*IKEA in Oslo was otherwise one of our very cheap weekend entertainments - you'd get out of town, and could buy really cheap Swedish candy and a hot dog for hardly any money. However, IKEA also represents one of the biggest arguments we've ever had. We were going to buy some storage for all the shoes in the all, and couldn't agree on which item to get. Tim famously stated that the one I preferred would make the hall claustrophobic... Anyway, after som arguing, which I of course won, we went off to pick up the storage unit - which we suddenly discovered weighed 30 kilos! So, that was our punishment for arguing in IKEA - in the three years we lived in the Oslo flat, we never had any storage for shoes...

Super Saturday!

Oh, we've had such a nice and relaxing beginning to the weekend

Yesterday, we went out for a few drinks after work with a few of Tim's colleagues. M joined us a bit later, and we went to a Chinese place for some simple (and cheap) food. Went on to a pub, where Tim - who was very tired - left us to talk about flowers and pink things and butterflies and periods and make up and all those other things we girls normally talk about.

Slept in this morning, and then went to Clapham Common (pic from Wikipedia).

Clapham is one of my new discoveries, not far from here - a 20 min walk further south. The common is, well, green and nice. There are some really nice houses around, and loads of trendy restaurants and fancy stores* and (towards Stockwell) the normal chains. We bought ourselves some sweets and drinks, and placed on in the sun in the middle of the Common. Absolutely gorgeous day - 18 degrees and sunny. Tim fell asleep on the grass, and I sat and studied the people around us. Headed back home at around five, and went upstairs, as we had been invited to dinner by our landlords. She had made some really nice slow cooked belly pork with roasted potatoes. Yummy! And then some nice wine on top, and a apple cake to end the meal. Lovely! And now we're about to watch the extended version of Alien vs. Predator...



*Among them one of the best butchers in London. It is very inspirational to look around in the shop (they really have some nice looking meats), but it's not exactly our price class. £30 for a chicken is hardly what I'm willing to spend... And, yes, I'm sure it's all locally produced, and ecological, and the chickens were happy and sang Kumbaya with the farmer - I'm still not paying that for a chicken!

Super Sunday

M and I went to the Swedish church last night, where they showed Melodifestivalen - the Swedish part of the Eurovision Song Contest. The place was absolutely packed, with a great atmosphere.* Went out afterwards with a big group of other Swedes, first to a bar, and then on to a restaurant. Got home at around 2.30, and, as you could probably guess, slept till lunch time today. But today has been such a beautiful day - sunny and warm. So Tim, M and I went down the street and had brunch at a local cafe. (Greasy food was high on our priority list, but as they were out of burgers I had a tuna baguette instead, but perfect brunch food.)

Tim and I then decided to go for a walk, and went down to Brixton.

(Picture from http://www.londonisfree.com/ongoing-events/markets)

I have been to the area a few times before (as it has the closest Argos), but last time we tried to visit the market it was absolutely pouring down, and we left rather quickly. But today was a perfect day for just strolling around. Of course, the actual market is not open on Sundays, but all the butchers, green grocers and fishmongers were still open. We became really excited, and ended up buying a kilo of really amazing beef for stews for only £3! And then a big bag of assorted veggies for £1.40! We are sooo going back there more often to do more shopping.

So, when we got back home Tim made a super yummy beef bourguignon (yes, I had to look up the spelling on that one). It was such a perfect ending to the weekend!


*Anyone curious can find the winner here.

Breakfast for adults

We had Tim's nephew visiting two weeks ago. He's eight, and very picky with food. Thus, we had to fill the fridge with whatever special stuff he wanted. I'm still eating his yogurts. "For stronger bones". "From 4-6 months onwards". It does not feel very grown up!

Dinner for adults

Monday: tea and M&Ms.

I think we just lost about 5000 gups. (We did defrost the chicken, we just couldn't be bothered to cook.)

Advice

Some pieces of advice for all the ladies out there...

1) Do not believe your husband when he says he will clean the pan in which he roasted a whole duck.

2) Do not leave a pan, in which you have roasted a whole duck, to stand for a week.

(Alternatively, do not cook duck.)

(No) more meatballs

After last nights embarrassment, things got even worse. We both got home late (obviously) and Tim decided to cook something nice and quick. The last meatballs! Perfect, really - fast and tasty. The workers had been in, changing one of the window panes, so it was a bit messy, but we were both too tired and hungry to do anything about it before dinner. Tim started frying the meatballs, but it was not long before one of them escaped, and jumped down on the sideboard. No problems. Not wanting to pick it up (don't ask me why), he simply rolled it down to the pan he held out below the bench. Then he remembered! There was saw dust and glass splinter everywhere. And all that had now been shoved in to the pan... Needless to say, we did not have any meatballs for dinner.

So, to cheer me up:

Late updates

A bit of a late update today. Spent all the in the Library (what's new? when was last time I didn't do that?), and Tim had to work too (write his paper for Tel Aviv). We also worked out that Peter and Elena will be away for the rest of the summer every time we are in town and vice versa. So decided to meet up with them after the library. Since Peter was out in Cambridge, we had to find some way of entertaining ourselves first. So, spent two hours in the Irish pub across the street (I like it because the serve Swedish Kopparberg's cider, and Tim, well, likes it because it's close). Tim read his book on Jewish manuscripts and I watched the football game. First time in years I watch a game, and all I get is to see Sweden lose to Spain. Pathetic! (And I now know why I prefer hockey - football is so slow!) Met Peter and Elena, and went to a really weird Indian vegetarian restaurant behind Euston station. My food ('Masala Dosa') looked liked mashed potatoes, spiced with something very yellow and wrapped up in paper (and basically tasted like it, too). And I normally love Indian food. Quite disappointing! So, today's lessons: Indian food should be traditional (but if you want something strange, go to 'Chutney') and ice hockey is more fun to watch than football.

Breakfasts

I have a new breakfast habit. I think it goes back to my early years of eating “Start” every morning (which, according to a rumor is sold at ‘Scandinavian Kitchen’), probably thanks to my father. But after my year in Wakefield any sort of cereal was just a big NO. I ate a yogurt with some crunchy cereal topping for every lunch in school for a whole year. After that, it took me almost three years before I could even look at yogurts again (and I still can’t manage to eat the really thick French ones). I’ve occasionally tried cornflakes and such just because it’s simple breakfast food. I normally find breakfasts incredibly boring, un-inspiring and stressful (most mornings anyway). And I hardly ever have breakfast with Tim, since he gets up about an hour before me (I guess I could get up at the same time, but he’s even worse than me, and doesn’t eat at all, so why bother?! And he also spends all morning in front of Spongebob Squarepants, which annoys the hell out of me.) Anyway, one day about six months ago, Tim came home with a box of Jordan’s Country Crisp (British oat and barley clusters, as it says on the box). He thought it looked like something I would like. Oh, how well he knows me! Oddly enough, I have been eating these more or less every morning every since. Admittedly, I vary between the raspberry and strawberry variants (strawberry being the better one, but I'm too afraid of only eating one kind), but I actually still enjoy them. I’m now just waiting for the day my body suddenly says ‘stop’, and the bare look of them will make me feel sick. But in the meantime, I almost enjoy breakfasts. And with my coffee, it is a real treat!

Coffee

I am really addicted to coffee. The super duper espresso machine which Tim bought me for Christmas hasn't really made things any better. (Largely inspired by the wonderful coffee maker Laura and Gerry introduced me to last summer.) I know some of you have already heard this a trillion times before, but my coffee machine is really worth it's weight in gold!

It's funny, though, because Nespresso has this thing for making themselves seem more exclusive than they actually are. You get to join 'the Nespresso club' (wow! yet another club for me!), can order special fancy looking containers for their coffee pods etc. They even do special editions of coffee! This season it's Goroka. I thought it was amazingly silly when I first saw it, but then... The coffee is sooo good, not made any worse by the fact that the coffee pods come in a lovely shade of dusty pink (the princess inside me is cheering!). I confess to having bought large quantities! However, when they also sell matching coffee cups just for the limited edition coffee, well, that feels like going too far. Or maybe it's just me not being exclusive enough? Damn, I should have become an investment banker!